Women love being pampered. She especially likes to be touched by the man she loves. Touching is the easiest and simplest way to make a girl feel loved and appreciated. If you want to please a woman, giving her a sensual massage can ease her way into sex.
You can start with a relaxing general massage before shifting the focus to your partner’s sex centers. The idea is to bring your partner to high levels of arousal and keep him or her there for a while. Below are some basics of sensual massage.
(1) Get him/her into a comfortable position and situation
The best place to give a massage is when he/she is lying down on a padded surface. Wherever it is, the place has to be padded with some blankets to protect him/her from unnecessary strains. A massage is best given when he/she is naked. If she does not want to be nude, then a bathing suit or underwear is fine. But a massage will be more sensual and erotic when your skin touches hers.
A romantic mood can be fostered with dim lights and soothing music. Turn off the cell phone to avoid any distraction. Before starting to give him/her a massage, make sure you are relaxed too. If you are tense, your strokes may hurt.
(2) Prepare some lubricants
Make sure you get some massage oil, preferably those scented ones. This will allow your hands to glide smoothly across her skin. If your massage include the female genitals, avoid using oil-based lubricants because they are not so easy to wash away, which can promote bacterial growth resulting in yeast infection. Make sure the water-based lubricant does not contain any Nonoxynol-9 because this can cause irritation. Never apply the oil or lotion directly onto his/her body.
(3) Maintain communication
During both the relaxation and general phases of your erotic massage, it is important for him/her to feel comfortable enough to make any requests and comments. If the one receiving the erotic massage is a man, communication can allow stimulation to be slowed down, changed or stopped before ejaculation becomes inevitable. It is a good idea to look into your partner’s eyes while your hands are on his or her genitals and based on his/her response you can adjust your strokes accordingly.
It is helpful to encourage your partner with hot and dirty talk or sexy compliments. Many sexual difficulties that women experience are due to worries such as her partner is getting tired of pleasuring her or she does not come fast enough, etc. Letting your receiving partner knows you enjoy giving her pleasure can be a powerful aphrodisiac for her.
(4) Watch your body posture and strokes
Keep your hands in contact with your partner, taking your time, being rhythmic yet sensitive and progressing from long gliding strokes to deep ones. When giving a massage be sure to use good body mechanics, use your body weight rather than arm strength for deep strokes and during gliding strokes keep your knees slightly bent.
(5) Neck and shoulders
Assuming your partner is now lying face down, the upper part of his/her body is the right place to start with because an awful lot of tension is built up there. Using your fingertips you slowly and gently knead (not pinch) on the shoulders. For the neck, you place one hand on each side of the neck, and then you move your hands in slow and gentle circles.
(6) Back, sides and buttocks
Continue with this circular motion on each side of the spine extending to the sides and lower back. Besides this, you rub in a diagonal motion on each side of the spine. Another way which I find very enjoyable is to straighten both hands one on each side of the spine, you lean forward using your body weight not using the force of your hands to press down on the back. You do this from the middle to the lower part of the back.
Using the inside of your forearm, you slowly rub one buttocks cheek at a time in a large circular motion. After that you make a fist and roll your knuckles, one by one, over the triangular bone at his/her lower back which is very helpful to relief stress.
Grab his/her ankle and massage with your thumbs and fingers all the way up his/her leg. But do not use too much pressure behind the knees to avoid hurting the sensitive veins there. For the feet, you use your thumbs to massage the soles in circular motion. Then you massage each toe by lightly squeezing it between your thumb and index finger and gently pulling on each one.
Your partner should be lying on his/her back facing you. To massage the head, you do not need any massage oil, so you use a towel to wipe the oil off your hands. You use the tips of your first 2 or 3 fingers to gently rub in a circular motion over his/her temples. With your thumb and first finger, you rub his/her ear lobes and ears and then you lightly run your fingers across his/her entire face. If you want to get more intimate, you can kiss his/her on the eyelids, nose tip and lips.
When massaging the clitoris, you need to know what works and feels best to her. Using your lubricated fingers to draw circles around it softly and rhythmically is a good way to start with. Once you discover something that works best for her, you continue with it. Some women find that clitoral orgasm feels better if their g-spots are stimulated at the same time using fingers or a dildo. Luxury vibrators or quality sex toys also work best on or near the clitoris. If the vibration is too intense, switch to a lower speed or put a cloth between the vibrator and her clitoris.
You can let her hold on to the vibrator while you use 1 or 2 fingers to reach for her g-spot (to rub on it in circular motion) which is about 2 inches away from the vaginal opening. You probably notice that her g-spot becomes bulging up as she gets more aroused, which means your fingers need to rotate a little away from the g-spot in order to maintain the same pressure on the vaginal walls. G-spot stimulation only feels good when the woman is aroused.